Amen. Well, good morning. I hope you're doing well. You good? You're here, so that's good, right? My name is Elan. If we have not met, and um I actually just wanted to share with you a little bit about the road trip. All my all my uh high schoolers over here. It was an incredible, incredible, and very exhausting couple of days, but it was really, really incredible. And I just wanted to come back and tell you because we owe it to let you know, because of all of your support, for you to know the difference that your prayers and that your contributions made for these students and honestly for volunteers and for me, because we go into this every year, you know, trying to serve these kids and to love on them. But God is so amazing, He's such a multitasker, because we end up walking away from the road trip being blessed ourselves. And so I just wanted to thank you. We went to Gatlinburg and we were in the Smoky Mountains, and whenever you kind of get away from you know your cell phone and the busyness and distractions and uh just the things that tug on us every single day, and you just have to stop and look and see for as long as your eyes can see, mountains and birds and trees and God's creation, you just feel known. You feel known. And these kids, they felt known, they felt known by the creator. They felt known, I believe, by each other. They got to build relationships and to bond in ways that that they probably haven't had a chance to do before. And and the volunteers got a chance to bond with each other. It's like it was just a whole big love fest. It was awesome. And um 39, 39 of our kids went all in with Jesus and were baptized. It was it was awesome. It was a beautiful moment, and I just want to thank you because if it wasn't for your prayers, if it wasn't for your generosity, then it wouldn't have been possible. Not one, not one student who wanted to go was turned away because of financial need, because we were able to meet that because of your generosity. And so thank you so much, and I'm so thankful that I get to be a part of this church, that you are my family. And that's really important because actually this morning, Justin called me at six o'clock and he is sick. Um, I'm really sorry that he's sick, he'll be fine. Um, but I'm also sorry for myself because he told me a couple of months ago to plan a back pocket message in case he got sick, and so I did. I'm I'm very, you know, I listened to my instructions and I did what I was told by my boss. But he liked that message, and I gave that the last time I spoke with you. So when he called me this morning and said, Elon, I know that this is very short notice and you probably don't have anything. Would you please um speak for me? I honestly wanted to say, no. No, I don't want to, thank you very much. I probably shouldn't tell you that, but that's the truth. And um, I was kind of freaking out for a minute, but we got off the phone, and I literally, in that moment, I started talking out loud, and I just said, Okay, God, you say to me, to us, that you have gone before us and that you will be with us. That's what you say, and I'm counting on it to be true today. And you know, I thought about Paul, the Apostle Paul. He never turned away from the opportunity to talk about God. And I want to be like that. And so I am unprepared, except my heart is full. My heart is full, and you have been prayed for, and I believe that today we're supposed to be here and that God has something to say. So I'm just gonna go with that, and I'm just gonna walk right into a story that I thought of when I got off the phone with Justin. Um, it's about my husband and me. Have you ever been in an argument, like an ongoing argument with someone for a long period of time, and it just doesn't seem to get resolved? You know, like you don't see eye to eye on this certain certain situation, and so you you you start to talk about it, thinking that this time is you're gonna communicate, and you start calm, and then all of a sudden, you know, the tempers flare and you get angry and you're like, but you did this and I did that, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and I didn't do this, and you know, you know how it goes. And then all of a sudden it's you, you're you're you're screaming at each other, you're leaving the room. That's kind of what was going on over this one particular issue. And Tab and I kept trying to talk it through. Every time our intentions were good, we'd come together and be like, okay, let's talk about this. And then, of course, one of the kids would need something, and or or you know, he would get a phone call from work, or um we would, you know, we would be hungry. Don't ever be hangry when you're trying to have a conversation. So this was going on for a long period of time, and we just were getting nowhere. But we knew that we had to work this out. So we decided um that we were gonna have a conversation on the phone because we were like, okay, maybe if it doesn't work any other way, then this will work. Well, it happened to be that Tab was gonna be on a on a work trip, and so was I. So we agreed that we were gonna get on the phone and talk it out, going to our respective places. So I thought this was a good idea. Now, here's one thing you need to know about me is um I am not good at arguing because I I can't come up with anything, anything that's smart or wise or anything in that moment. But I have won so many arguments in front of the mirror afterwards. You know what I'm talking about? Or you get in the car and you're like, oh no, this is what I would have said. I mean, I I can't, I am terrible at confrontation. My husband is very good at it. He's a coach, so you know he's gotta be. I I don't know why that represents coaching, but anyway, so but he's really, really good at coming up with things and um and being really concise with what he wants to say, and I am not. Well, before we got on the phone, because I knew this conversation was gonna take place, before we got on the phone, I prayed and I was just like, Lord, you just speak to me, give me the words, help me to just be really clear, help me to be loving, you know, all those things. So we get on the phone. I'm just gonna be honest with you, I was killing it. I'm serious. Like the things that were coming out of my mouth were brilliant. I mean, I was saying things that I was like, I can't, this must be God talking. And I knew that I was making a difference because the whole time Tab was silent. You know how it gets when you have like a heated argument and you keep interrupting each other? Well, this time, nothing. Tab had nothing to say. And I'm just like, okay. So so I start talking and I'm saying all these wonderful, brilliant points, and he's not saying anything. Now, this went on for just a few minutes, and uh, it was weird. I had this feeling washed over me that I was like, not as mad as I had been. So I start to kind of calm down, and I had one last point, you know, talk about back pocket. I had one last point that I wanted to make, and he was so quiet. So I said this point, and and after I shared it, I just felt such love for him. And so I I wanted to hear from him. So I said, So so Tab, I mean, do you understand? Do you understand where I'm coming from? Nothing. He didn't say anything, and I was thinking, oh, he's he's really thinking before he speaks. Like he really wants to say something, you know, that is thoughtful and loving. And so I wait a little longer and I think, okay, maybe he's really, he's really trying to come up with something right to say. So I wait. Tom. And then I thought, he's crying. I made my husband cry. And I'm sorry, but that is a celebration. And so I gave it a moment. I knew he had his manhood to think about, so I didn't want to embarrass him and ask, are you crying? So I just waited a second, and and a couple more moments passed, and and I was like, Okay, Tab, you know, I really want to hear from you. What do you what do you have to tell me? Now I know many of you have figured out by now what has happened. But let me tell you, it was news to me. Apparently, the call had gotten dropped. Later on, when I talked to him, I was like, okay, for real. For real, did you hang up the phone on me? He was like, I promise you, I promise you, I didn't. I even tried to tell you, no way, I didn't, I can't hear. And it hung up, and I and I said, Well, when was the last thing? What was the last thing you heard me say? And he was like, Listen, I really want to tell you something that's on my heart. All of that for nothing. You know, it's funny though, when I think back to that conversation, um, you know, because God I God wants to tell us something in everything that happens in our life. And if we could just kind of wise up enough to stop for just a second and stop moving on to the next thing, but really stay for a moment and say, well, what were you trying to teach me in that? Then I think that we could really learn a lot. And I did that because it was really frustrating. It really was, because I had something I wanted to say to him and I needed him to hear, and he didn't actually hear it, not to any fault of his own. But I was like, God, why? You know? And here's what he kind of gave me. You know, the truth of the matter is, is you and I as humans, we have this desire to be heard and understood. It's in our nature. When we feel heard, when we feel understood, we feel loved. And when we feel loved, it's amazing what happens to any anger or resentment or or strife that we may have, whether it's in life or with other people. It's the truth. And you know what? God doesn't want us to live in relationships, whether it's with our spouse or a colleague or a parent or a sibling or a neighbor or a friend, it doesn't matter. He doesn't want us to be in any kind of relationship where there's anger and hostility and harsh words spoken to each other all the time. And that's not because he's this God who rules over us and tells us all these rules. It's because he knows what's best for us. He knows what we need in order to thrive. And he talks a lot about anger and thinking before we speak in the Bible. I pulled a couple verses I want to share it with you. In James 1.19, I love this, what James says. Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters, you must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Proverbs 15.1, a gentle answer deflects anger, but a harsh word makes tempers flare. Proverbs 18, 2 says, fools have no interest in understanding. They only want to err their own opinions. And then in Philippians 2, verse 3 through 5, do not be selfish. Don't try to impress others. Be humble. Thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don't look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others too. You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Man, it's so true and it's so hard. Because life doesn't just go on this easy little path all day long where you wake up when you want to wake up and you got your cup of coffee and you don't get interrupted, and traffic is fine, and everybody goes along with what you want to do. And honestly, the truth is too, at least in my experience, I don't know about you, is I am way nicer sometimes, way more patient sometimes, way more forgiving and graceful to people I don't even know. And then I come home and I'm worn out and I'm exhausted, rightfully so. And my patience, my patience is wearing thin. And God doesn't want us to live that way. Whether it's at home, in our relationships, you know, it doesn't really matter where we are. He doesn't want that for us. You know, I know I started this story off with something funny, but but just kind of, since I'm talking about Tab and may I just be transparent with you, you know, there was a time where it wasn't so funny. Um, about seven years into our marriage, so Tab and I have been married for 13 years, about seven years into our marriage, we just we just really hit a hard spot. You know, like you don't even know how you get to this point, but one day you kind of wake up and you you feel like you're strangers in a way. You still love that person and you certainly want things to be okay, but you just you're just not feeling it. That honeymoon feeling, it's just not there. And um we were we were there, we were kind of at that spot, and we had a uh a newborn at the time, and just to kind of let you know where my headspace was, um, I didn't want to go back to work, I wanted to stay home with the baby. My husband's a coach and a teacher, and I love that he is, but that doesn't afford us the opportunity for me to stay home, and and so and and we both had started new jobs right after our our oldest Rachel was born, and so um we were starting a new job, I was starting a new job and learning how to do this as a mom, and and we weren't seeing each other very much because we had started a new job and because we had a new baby, and so we weren't talking as much, and I really honestly felt like we were ships, sort of just passing in the night. There came this point where we were just arguing and arguing and arguing and arguing, and I really remember thinking, how is this gonna turn out? I how is this gonna turn out? I was afraid. I was afraid and he was too. And we we both agreed that like we needed help and we needed it yesterday, and we got to do something right now for our marriage. And so we were like, well, let's go get counseling because that's what we need to do. But we were poor, we had no money. So it's like, what do you do when you need help and you need a counselor, but you have no money? I mean, prayer works, yes, but we need help now. And so I prayed about it and he prayed about it, and I came up to him and I said, Tub, listen, if you trust me not to manipulate this situation at all, will you let me come up with some plans, some lessons? Because see, by nature I'm a teacher. And so I was like, you know what, let me go to my get my gift, let me go to my skill, and let me use that. And so so I said, Can I come up with some lesson plans? And he's like, Yeah, let's do it. We have no money, I trust you, go for it. So I prayed, and I'm just telling you, and this is why I want to share this with you right now, because I really believe that this really, really can help all of us, and it's a good reminder for me too, that God really put on my heart that really we complicate things so much when really it's so easy. So I came to Tab and I said, okay, here's the deal. I prayed about this and I believe this is what God wants us to do. So we sat down at the table, we decided ahead of time what time and where we were gonna sit. Because you know, having kids, having work and interruptions, it's so easy to get your schedule, you know, claimed for you. And so we made, we made it on our calendar. We were going to sit down for 30 minutes and we were going to meet. And so we had that on our calendar, we looked forward to it, prayed about it all week long. We sat down and there was there was there were two things we were gonna do. The first thing is we were both gonna come to the table with one thing that we absolutely needed the other person to do for us. I mean, I'm talking a need. I'm not talking like I just want you to buy me flowers or I want you to open the car door for me. I'm talking like, I really, I need for you to do this for me. And and so that was our homework. We were gonna come to the table with one need, and then the other thing was, and this was the hardest part. When when the person was sharing their one need, the other person could not say a single word. That's so hard. Because I don't know about you, but I like to get defensive. I'm like, wait, you don't think I do that? Do you know how long that I work? And I want to defend. So it was really, really good that we agreed that we weren't gonna rebuttal a single solitary thing. You know what blows my mind is what our one need was, because it was so simple. My one need to tap was I just wanted him to say thank you. I know my husband was grateful in his heart, but I personally needed to hear him say, thank you. Thank you for taking care of our child. Thank you that you are taking care of our child and you're working full-time. I know that's not easy. Thank you. Thank you for being a supportive wife. Thank you for cleaning the house. You know, thank you for picking up my slack when it's in when we're in season. Thank you for cooking dinner. It's the simple things that I know he appreciated, but I needed to hear it. I needed that. And I can't even believe what his one need was. Because I will be honest, I honestly, I didn't give him the credit as a guy, like that he really had that depth, that he had some kind of need that was like, gosh, this is sounding really bad. But you know, honestly, we all joke, women are the emotional ones, and guys are not, they're like robotic, you know, like I have no emotion. But the truth of the matter is, thank you, my my my high schoolers are laughing at me. Um, but the truth of the matter is, is that he's a child of God too. And his one need for me, and ladies, listen up. His one need for me was Elon, I need you to ask me how my day at work was. And I couldn't even believe it, because that sounds like really that's that important. Now, listen, my husband is a football coach, and they talk X's and O's and all this kind of stuff, and he comes home, and I'll be real honest, this is all I hear him saying. I know I'm such a dork, okay? But that is truly what I hear, because I don't understand football. But see, what I realize is he doesn't care if I understand. He wants me to be interested in what interests him. So here was our deal. For one week, for seven days, our only job, our only role, our only responsibility was to fulfill that one need in each person's life for the entire week. And I'm just saying, God is just if we will just give him that much of ourselves, he just pours it down. Because within two days, it was like all of those issues, they just we got them in perspective. Because here's what happens you know, he would walk into the house and he would be looking for anything to thank me on, and he just gratitude just poured out of his mouth. You know what happened to me? Oh, I just felt so loved and appreciated. So then when I did, I just poured it out to him. Oh, how is how was work today? And I was genuinely interested, and he would go on and he'd start speaking his foreign language, and and I would just be listening. And and then, because he felt so loved, then he would go not just not thank me, he would actually go do one of the responsibilities that I had to show his gratitude for me. How simple. How simple it didn't cost a dime of counseling. There were no there were no arguments, there was no shouting. So often we are so quick to want to be understood that we don't take a moment to try to understand, to try to understand where someone else is coming from. And and I know I'm sitting here talking about marriage, and some of you are not married, but here's the deal: it's about relationship, it's about communication, it's about love. And we're all in this thing together. And whether it's whether it's your parents, we were on the road trip and we were having this conversation about, you know, how it's really hard when a parent has a teenager and the teenager's trying to spread their wings and the parents trying to hold on, and it's like this big conflict. And and and I just shared with one of the kids, I was just like, listen, I know that you're frustrated, but your parents are children of God. They are a child. They have fears and doubts and struggles and worries, and all the very real things that you struggle with too. Don't give them so much of a hard time. They're doing the best they can, and they are terrified, by the way, that they've messed up or that you're not gonna be okay. You know, or even at work, it doesn't have to be someone that you are in a close relationship with. I remember back a while back I had a conflict with a woman at work, and I just we did not care for each other, but we worked very closely with each other. So we had to make it work, and we just were constantly butting heads. I dreaded going to work. I'm sure she pretty much dreaded seeing me walk down the hallway. I mean, we it was just not good. And and we weren't getting anywhere, and we had to resolve this, and we weren't gonna sit down and talk about our one need with each other. And so I just was like, okay, God, obviously this is not really the way you want me to behave. And obviously, there is something in this that I can do, so show me. And I prayed. And and God really put it on my heart that I was going, that I was to pray for her, because let me tell you something. Angry people, hurt people, hurt people. When we're hurt and we're angry, what do we do? We take it out on someone else. And God put that on my heart for her that she was angry about something else, that she had a wound, and she was his child. So I prayed for her. And then I just started looking for ways I could serve her, whether it was that she didn't even know, whether it was finding the copies on the copy machine that I knew were hers and just putting it on her desk and walking away. It was kind of a thing between me and God. It was something he was working on with me. You know, I share all of this, and I don't know, you know, what relationships you're in. It could be friends, it could just be good friends where you just, you are just, you had an argument and you see it one way and they see it another way, and you cannot resolve it for the life of you. But y'all, sometimes it just doesn't matter. Sometimes you don't need to split hairs. Did Jesus no? He loved. Loving is not easy, but it is the way. It is the best way. And you know what is so awesome? Thank you, Jesus. What is so awesome is that when we love other people and when we put their needs first, we actually are the ones who get blessed. That is how generous our God is. His whole ministry, Jesus' whole ministry was about love. And it doesn't have to be complicated, it doesn't have to cost a dime. It doesn't even have to inconvenience you. It can be fun. But we got to get outside of ourselves and about what we want and what we need the other person to do and start looking to them. What can we do for them? And I'm telling you, with that woman at work, with my husband, and with a myriad of other experiences that I've had, every time that I've said, okay, God, help me know how to love this person. What do they need? I'm humbling myself and it's uncomfortable every time. It doesn't take a day or two before everything starts changing. And you know what she did? She did the same thing my husband did. It's not like we had a conversation, but she could feel this sense of love. I know she could, because she was doing things for me that she never had done before. She was paying compliments about me behind my back that she had never done before. That is God. If we don't ever talk about or learn anything else in our whole existence here on earth than to love, then that's it. Then that's all. He talks about it. I'm going to close with this message or this verse or passage in 1 Corinthians. We all know this. 1 Corinthians 13. I'm actually reading from the message because sometimes it's nice to hear it put a different way. But this is how important love is to God. It says, love never gives up. Hold on, wait. Think about right now that person. Your parent, your sibling, your spouse, your colleague. I want you to think about that person right now. We've all got that person. Okay, now let me read this. Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, doesn't have a swelled head, doesn't force itself on others. It isn't always me first. It doesn't fly off the handle. It doesn't keep score of sins of others. It doesn't revel when others grovel. It takes pleasure in the flowering of truth. It puts up with anything. Trusts God always always looks for the best. Never looks back. But keeps going to the end. Our Savior gave us the perfect example of going to the end when we didn't deserve it. Isn't it the very least that we could do to go out into our week this week and look for ways that we can love other people, even when they don't deserve it, because honestly, we don't deserve it. But that's what grace is, and that's what love is. And I believe that when we do that, we aren't just blessing another person. We are getting blessed. And the world will change. All from this simple thing of love. So will you join me this week? Will you meet one need for someone else? Let's pray. Father, oh God. Even though I just honestly, my my knees have been buckling, I can't even believe this is happening. But I thank you. I just thank you for the opportunity to just be with this family. Lord, you your message is so strong and it's so clear and it's so consistent and it's so powerful and it's so life-changing. And you give us such an incredible example. God, help us to be bold. Help us to be bold and obedient. Help us to be unafraid. Help us to be selfless. Help us, Lord, to be humble. Help us to put the needs of other people, especially the people who are closest to us, especially our family. Help us to put their needs before ours. God, help us. Give us strength. Give us humility. Give us love. Thank you for just the primo example that you left us. Thank you for continually pouring your grace and your faithfulness over us so that we can get up every day and do it again. And I ask that you empower us to be convicted enough that we will do something. Lord, thank you. Thank you for your promise. We love you. We love you. I pray for every marriage, every every parent and child relationship, every friend and friend relationship, every every work relationship. I pray for every every every person in their own spirit. Lord, I just pray right now for your grace and your love to just wash over all of us. That we would be so filled right now, Lord Jesus, with your Holy Spirit that we would have no choice but to overflow and fill every walk where we go this week, every person we encounter. Lord, you gave us the example for a reason. And I pray that we will not pass up the opportunity. And I thank you. I thank you for what you want to do in our lives. We love you, Jesus. Amen.